for when you don't know what else to say

Tuesday, March 25, 2008

Is it too late to re-register as a Republican?

Damn you, McCain. Every time I get out, you pull me back in! Do not play this clip in the company of small animals or easily frightened children. Also, don't try to rhyme "McCain" with "Amen" as these women do. Your brain will explode.

Tuesday, March 18, 2008

Naughty Nachos for McGreevey

With the trio of politician sex scandals rocking the Northeast these past two weeks, I'm getting tired of learning about how dirty our leaders are. Spitzer broke the law, which is stupid. As for his replacement releasing his affair history? I guess it's good he got that out of the way, but I feel like it's none of our business.

The best story by far was Jim "Gay American" McGreevey's TGIFriday three-way. What a hilariously unappealing story. A limo driver, a closet dweller and his soon-to-be-wife, living their version of a bizarro-world letter to Penthouse. Budget-friendly dinner at TGIFriday's? What a sensual way to stoke the fires of illicit passion!

I took a look at some of the menus at popular chain restaurants, and here are some sure-fire (and cheap!) dishes to heat up your next menage-a-trois:

Friday’s Three For All: our big-enough-to-share platter features a trio of our most famous appetizers: Loaded Potato Skins, Fried Mozzarella and our spicy Buffalo Wings.
The appetizer that probably inspired the whole sordid affair.

Macaroni Grill
Mama's Trio: Three Italian classics with a delicious new taste. Primo Chicken Parmesan, Layers & Layers of Lasagna and Chicken Cannelloni
The perfect cheese-infused warm-up, to a night of hot gubernatorial action.

Smokehouse Bacon Triple-The-Cheese Big Mouth Burger: Extra thick-cut jalapeno applewood smoked bacon triple-layered with smoked cheddar, Swiss and provolone cheers, sautéed onions, shredded lettuce, tomato, pickle and jalapeno ranch dressing.
Wow - the description alone sounds dirty.

Fajita Trio: Tender grilled steak, marinated grilled chicken and spicy garlic & lime grilled shrimp. Served sizzling w/onions & bell peppers.
Did somebody say sizzling? I think we’ve got a winner.

Ultimate Trio: Pick three delicious appetizers from a menu of favorites.
I think with this one, you could pick a better participant than your limo driver.

With delectable delights like this on the menu, you're sure to score sexy points with employees and beards alike!

Friday, March 14, 2008

Florida and Michigan - Hillary Logic

I had to laugh at this series of videos. Some design firm lurves Obama, and has made some movies to support his cause. Here's one about the delegates from the dumb states.

And here's one on the experience argument:

And here's the VP offer she's put out there:

Thursday, March 06, 2008

Sawyer's Sobriquets

Sawyer from Lost is hot and tortured and badass and endearingly dorky and, most importantly, clever with nicknames. And this is why I lurve him. Enjoy a sampler of his finest work below.

Wednesday, March 05, 2008

Praise the Lord (of the CW)

The CW announced that they are renewing Supernatural and One Tree Hill. And Gossip Girl too, which I haven't had the chance to experience, but I am told is delicious. I'm very excited by this development.

I've written about my love for Supernatural before. The premise is simple: pretty, pretty boys driving, crackin' jokes, and kicking ghost and demon ass across our fine country. This is a pleasure that I simply do not feel guilty enjoying. Ackles and Padelecki give good performances, the stories are actually scary, the classic rock soundtrack is great, and it's shot very artistically. I like the mythology they are building, which is something original (a rarity these days, I know). And it provides a welcome escape. It's nice to be able to slip into a world where your atrocious job can be put into perspective. After all, you're not dealing with crazy phenomena.

One Tree Hill is one of those secret favorites of mine. The show is so ridiculous, it reminds me of the kind of story that I would've come up with in the 8th grade. 16-year-olds get married. People have babies at a graduation ceremony, take the baby home and lose all their by weight in time for a party a few hours later. The little town of Tree Hill is an international hub for commerce and entertainment. K-Fed is a credible guest star. This show is the nighttime equivalent of Passions. All the girls have really cute, shiny hair. Haley is a sweetheart, Brooke kicks ass, the basketball boys are cool, and there's plenty going on to be able to completely ignore the Peyton-Lucas will they or won't they conversation of the week.

So thank you CW. You are keeping me well-stocked in the escapist fare I thrive on.